Wednesday 15 September 2010

Mixtape

''If you turned every man you've ever slept with into a song, you'd have one HELL of a mixtape''
GG

This is probably the funniest quote I've heard aimed at me all year. Lucky I have a sense of humour.
So I'm going to start this off with how much a comment made to me recently has played on my mind and that's very out of the ordinary for me, I hear things and very rarely take them personally.
I was recently called shallow due to the amount of acquaintances I have, be it male and for the night or friends I've had for a very long time. Aimed at me by someone of no specific importance to me or my tight group of friends at all but someone who I have recently trusted with tales of my shinanigans. It annoyed me and some of my other friends all the same. If I'm to be honest? I, for a moment agreed with the person who shot me down with it. Until of course, the most honest and frank friend of mine made me feel better, even if she doesn't quite know how to word things sometimes (and trust me she really doesn't). It's nice when you get a surprise though.....

''without sounding offensive to you Squire because you're the best thing about my weekdays but. That woman hasn't seen some of the people you deal with eh? she clearly doesn't know you or the people you let in your life (she pauses thinking ''shall I say it?'') or your bed (she laughs to herself for a while), just let the comment slide no?''

Now.... Anyone would take offence to that because it's basically, in a nutshell her saying I've slept with anyone and anything (and just for the record I don't let them in my own personal bed. I live with my parents that would be more grief than it's worth) but she has an extremely valid point. Bear in mind the majority of the time I'm highly intoxicated and have a very strong pair of beer glasses on. I do find the best in people even if only knowing them for an hour or month, it's not me being, easy? It's just me being naive, ask anyone, that's my downfall.
Obviously me and my colleague are very close and can talk to one another about anything, and that's exactly what we do. Working with someone and letting them know that much about you can sometimes be a dangerous game but, I think (without going into detail) it's fair to say, my workplace wouldn't be shocked if any of this came out.
With that previous comment in mind, I know she doesn't just mean who I sleep with. She means (and she has said this) the people I have ever taken in as friends, family, lovers, boyfriends. It's not just how a person looks, it's how a person acts, is and treats you.

''from what you tell me, you let alot of people in your life knowing full well what they're like and how they can be. That's not shallow otherwise you'd see through them and then choose to have nothing to do with them just to save face. You are naive.... You are not shallow, you're stupid''

The friend I'm having said conversation with is the complete opposite to me, more than you could imagine. Sometimes I look at the 2 of us together and go over conversations that we've had in my head and I find myself baffled as to how we get on so well.
She hates the same music as me, thinks what I wear is odd, she can't grasp the fact that I don't brush, dye or ADD hair to my hair, that I go to gigs and share my sweat with other people, that I mosh, that I can handle and quite happily take public transport, I don't wear fake tan, I can pick up a Spider and throw it out the window, I'll go to strange places on holiday, stay in Hostels when in that strange place, I'll try food even if it looks odd or smells disgusting, I can go to a festival and not wash for a whole week aswel as take a wee in my tent (into an appropriate object obviously, not just there next to my sleeping bag), she also can't get her head around the fact that there's an eight out of ten percent chance that when I go out I don't go home to my own bed and in the morning feel okay about it.
It is all the above that make her realise how I'm far from shallow. She can quite happily admit to being exactly that and every now and then, a little bit judgmental at the same time, she understands the fact that there is women out there that aren't like her and don't share her view on everything.
This is one of the reasons she's personally told me she likes me

''you're different and although I don't agree with how you are and what you do, it's interesting to hear stories from you happy or sad. It's nice to know someone who isn't just a plain Jane and who actually has space in her heart for everyone''

That right there, made me feel relieved and made the comment made by the anonymous, pointless person disappear.

''Katie. You go out and enjoy yourself, you see the world and its men and I can see how that aspect of travelling and music can entice a woman, I'm not personally like that but I appreciate you are and that you're honest with it. There's secretly a part of me that aspires to be like you''

I can't say I've had anyone say anything like that to me, but I've never felt happier or more confident with myself and the person I am. My friend knows there's nothing I'm more passionate about than music which is where my ''Quote of the year'' came from, if she could compare my lifestyle to anything, it's going to be a song or two.
On that quote she ended the conversation with

''If you enjoy it, what's the harm? You'd have one hell of a mix tape and that's more than most boring, uncultured women can say, that's what makes them the shallow one's. Not you''

For a young woman that doesn't understand most simple jokes and lives in her own (somewhat Blond) little bubble.... She made the most sense and brought to light the fact I do enjoy myself and should see nothing wrong with it. That's alot for someone like her to say.

Thank god for those people who don't like those people like me.

x

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